Yes, Spoiler Detected. Ugh White Collar is on break (soon!), Breaking Bad has a an 8 episode break too. Suits also breaks on 10 eps. Each of them return on January. So what’s the news? Source
Breaking Bad: How Much Cash Was in That Storage Unit?
In an exchange that seemed at least partially aimed at the internet, Skyler told Walt during Sunday’s Breaking Bad finale that he’d made too much money for one person to count, let alone launder. But the internet loves a challenge, and so it was probably only a matter of time before someone tried to come up with a better response to Walt’s inquiry of “How much is this?” than Skyler’s “I have no earthly idea.”
Knowing that Walt gave a couple of duffle bags to Jesse—presumably the $5 million he was owed and not a cent more—you’d expect the total in the storage unit to be much higher. But how high? Walt previously turned down a $5 million payout from selling the methylamine to Declan and then worked for several months straight with Todd to cook for his own territory, for Declan’s territory, and for Lydia’s Czech Republic territory combined. That’s a lot of meth and lot of profit, even with Declan and Lydia taking a healthy piece of it.
Yesterday, a pair of tweets by Baseball America writer (and likely stats geek) JJ Cooper posited that Walt’s haul is somewhere between $17 and $25.5 million depending on the size of the denominations of the bills:
“Random thought. If the stack of money on Breaking Bad this week was all $50s I estimate it would be around $17 million. Half 100s means 25.5”
And a thread on Quora estimates larger dimensions for the cube, arriving at a total as high as $43.8 million in the (unlikely) event that every bundle in the block contained $5,000.
Here’s a side-by-side look at Walt wrapping a bundle of twenties into a packet of $2,000, as seen in “Gliding Over All,” and a bundle of $100 bills that amounts to $10,000:
Since Skyler mentioned mixed denominations, the total per bundle is somewhere in between. Depending on your opinion regarding the dimensions of the money cube, you can arrive at wildly different totals, from a floor of $15 million all the way up to $80 million.
Here’s a side-by-side look at Breaking Bad‘s money pile and a pile that amounts to $205 million, from a 2007 drug raid in Mexico City.
Show creator Vince Gilligan said in this week’s Breaking Bad Insider Podcast that $80 million might be a bit too high:
“I asked prop master Mark Hansen, and he and his guys had tried, just for their own edification, to figure out how much that would be if it was roughly a half-and-half mix of twenties and fifties, and he guessed somewhere in the vicinity of eighty million dollars—eighty, eighty-five, ninety—that’s a lotta dough. I don’t know, we may have erred on the side of showmanship there instead of reality, I don’t know if [Walt] could’ve made that much that quickly.”
So how much would it take for Walt to walk away entirely? We know that Skyler was able to launder the money via the car wash when it was only in the single-digit millions territory. She likely waited to rent the storage unit until she was dealing with more than $10 million. So where did the total end up? I’d bet it’s somewhere north of $50 million.
What do you guys think? Post your own calculations in the comments!
White Collar “Ancient History” Review: Beta Banned
Few things are as awkward as running into an ex, but in the world of White Collar it’s basically the opposite: It’s straight-up thrilling! See, in real life we tend to run into our exes in unglamorous places, like at grocery store, and we’re probably dressed in sweatpants. But in this show Neal runs into exes while wearing three-piece suits in five star hotels or swanky social events and usually the exes are international art thieves looking to ensnare him into elaborate double-cross cons. You know? Meanwhile WE would just be awkwardly explaining to our exes why we were staring at sheet cakes in a grocery store at 1 a.m. Anyway, this whole insanely-hot-criminal-mastermind-ex element is just one more reason why this is the best show through which to live vicariously!
So which gorgeous criminal mastermind from Neal’s past showed up in “Ancient History”? None other than Alex, the Greek femme fatale last seen in the Season 2 finale who’d basically been thrown under the bus, crime-wise, after the whole U-boat treasure thing first went down. She’d evidently been chilling in a Greek prison for a year and a half for attempting to steal ancient antiquities (do NOT call them antiques), but only days after her release had already become embroiled in some heavy-duty ancient artifact purloining. Not only did a heist Neal had infiltrated feel like Alex was somehow involved, she explicitly sought him out afterward using her ol’ yellow-origami-flower trick. It turned out she was indeed in town, which meant that the FBI now needed Neal to figure out her involvement in the new scheme. Or something. Did it matter? Neal and Alex were suddenly hanging out again!
Meanwhile Mozzie had grown ultra-jealous after Neal received a secret Beta videotape which had been posthumously sent to him by Ellen on the occasion of her death. Neal decided that he only wanted to watch the tape with Sam, and not Mozzie, even though Mozzie owned A LOT of Beta players! I mean, that’s just rude right there. So that’s when Mozzie resorted to desperate measures: He contacted Peter to help him spy on Neal. (But only after generously bestowing upon Peter the gift of a 2-ton stone coin from his travels.) So yeah, our favorite odd couple teamed up to somehow infiltrate Sam and Neal’s relationship, as a couple of jealous, jilted besties are wont to do. But this led to a situation in which Mozzie got the wrong address for Sam’s apartment and ended up snooping around ALEX’s apartment. Which was being staked out by Peter and led to HIM joining Mozzie in Alex’s bathroom just before Alex and Neal arrived back from one of their high-chemistry banter-dates. It was all as farcical as it was HANDSOME.
After Alex discovered that Neal had been infiltrating her goings-on, they understandably had a falling out. As did Neal, Peter, and Mozzie when Neal found out what they’d been doing. Seriously, Neal looked SO MAD at them. (Aw, I hate it when they fight.) But eventually Neal came around a bit after it became clear that he’d been unnecessarily keeping secrets also, and he agreed to help Peter continue with the Alex case. In their ruse, Neal would pretend to win back Alex’s trust by helping her knock over a local museum (the FBI agreed to this because it would lead them to Alex’s shadowy boss). And, in one of the broader schemes ever featured on White Collar, Neal impersonated BANKSY and got the museum to not only allow him to spray paint their walls, but also close it to the public AND shut off its security cameras. All that without even attempting a British accent. And you know what? It sounded plausible to me! Seriously, the art world is nuts. I wouldn’t put it past that gallery owner to be so gullible.
The twist was that ONCE AGAIN the heist was interrupted by the NYPD, meaning that someone aside from the undercover participants wanted the thieves to be caught. As it turned out Alex herself wanted the heists to be thwarted so that the police would confiscate all the valuables into their storage locker and she could just bust in and take them all at once! (Which, haha, okay show.) So yeah, it did appear that Alex was using Neal just as much as he’d used her. And because this was White Collar, just because someone is on the run doesn’t mean she won’t sneak into your apartment for one last farewell conversation. Sure beats an awkward goodbye in the grocery store dessert aisle, am I right?
Finally, because we can only progress the over-arching story with the tiniest of baby-steps, the episode ended with Neal agreeing to watch his Beta tape with Mozzie and Peter after all. So he pressed play, and… CREDITS! Oh,White Collar, you big tease. Another solid episode in what’s turning out to be a solid season. (“Solid” is the correct term here, right? Nothing mind-blowing, just super dependable.) Only two more episodes until hiatus!
And now some pictorial observations for you guys:
… Do we like Diana’s ponytail?
… Who WAS this guy? Can he be a new character please?
… Whoa, it actually RAINS in New York?
… Y’all gonna tune in next week for THIS?: